“As long as we are not ourselves, we will try to be what other people are.” -Malidoma Patrice Somé (Of Water and the Spirit)
I Already Know was written during the summer of 2017. I had a lot of people giving me advice at the time, and a lot of it went right over my head, because most of what they were saying was bland, basic, and stuff I already knew. On the other hand, I had no experience living by myself, making decisions, and knowing where to go or what to do as an adult. While writing this song, I was also working on a track called I Don't Know What I'm Doing, because I really didn't. I had the basics down, but when it came to stuff I had no prior knowledge about, I was truly lost. So, I Already Know represents the happy-go-lucky side of my life at that time.
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The first verse deals with the toxic relationship I was dealing with at the time. At times, I know I put the spotlight on myself. I don't take other people's thoughts and emotions into account. That's how I am to begin the verse. I'm waving and pointing the finger, but when I realize I'm not perfect, I start to pick at myself and realize that I could potentially be doing the same thing.
Going through heartbreak and wanting to believe lies that were so blatantly false had me bearing a weight on my shoulders that I felt like this song helped me break down.
The second verse was all about bringing to light the real truth. It's a one-sided, confrontational conversation. I was putting my foot down and really expressing how I felt. It's a revelation (or as much of a revelation as it can be when you already know the truth). "If the judge would give me the chair, then I would rather die / If they would send me to hell for the left, then I would write / And I just keep the peace now because that's just what I like" is probably one of my favorite lines in any of my songs, because I feel like this is really me. If I were to be put to death for telling the truth, kill me. If they want to crucify me for doing something different (I'm also left-handed), then I'm just going to do it regardless. I also thought this was pretty clever wording, because left and right are opposites, and depending on how you hear it, you might think that I would give in to what they want, but I'm not for it. I close it by saying that I like peace, because that's really how I love to live.
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